He's Got About a Seven Iron
turbotodd 100000388Y Visits (1892)
Having returned from my American Labor Day holiday respite restored and rested (not to mention greatly alliterated), my golf handicap no better (or worse) for the wear, I found myself having to remind myself how to use my computer again.
Yes, for the most part, it was a technology-free weekend. I opted out of opting in to to much computer usage during the holiday weekend, saving my labor for the links and giving my PC-weary eyes a needed rest.
So, there was no technology, save for the Bushnell yardage binoculars my dad's country club pro demonstrated on the 2nd hole of the Denton Country Club in my hometown of Denton, Texas (the "Home of Happiness," for all you "Rocky Horror Picture Show" fans out there.)
Just a jump to the left, and I was able to leverage the Bushnells' laser-bouncing Yardage Pro Trophy Laser Rangefinder to identify that I was precisely 173 yards from the pin.
For those non-golfers in the audience, knowing your yardage in golf is a very important piece of information, particularly for those subtle 10-20 yard differences one often finds in one's iron play.
Yardage markers stuck in the ground that you can never find? Ppp-shaw, an historical relic of golf's past.
Get yourself some laser-precise golfing binoculars and play some smart golf! You'll never have to worry again about how many yards to the right of the hole you knocked that six-iron with your teeth-grinding slice (although you still may be liable for the collateral damage of those broken windshields or fairway-facing living room windows).
If the Bushnell ain't doing the trick, and you'd prefer a geosatellite view of where your little white ball rests, there are now wireless providers apparently providing GPS readers for mobile phone services, so that if you're out on the links and not quite sure how far away you are from the #5 pin, Ma Bell will hook you up with a quick GPS read via your Motorola Razr.
Free Intertubes Access in the Valley
And speaking of wireless networks, yesterday IBM and a consortium of other tech companies announced they would be providing free high-speed wireless Internet access to large portions of Silicon Valley and the surrounding environs, some 1,500 square miles!
The service will provide free basic wireless access at speeds up to 1 megabit per second in outdoor areas (special equipment estimated to cost from $80 to $120 will be required for bolstering the signal so that it's strong enough to receive inside buildings).
So does this mean that golf carts will soon be wi-fi-enabled as well?
Does this mean I'm now going to have to take my laptop to the golf course?
Is there no sacred ground?
What's next, underwater wi-fi so I can instant message with the dolphins???